Britain First have been growing increasingly furious about the length of time it is taking for them to receive their medal.

Pea-brained knuckle-dragger Paul Goulding spoke of his fury to our reporter this afternoon. “It’s not right though, is it? I’ve lived here all my life, I was born here, so was my mum and probably my dad.We’re like, dead proud of our country and stuff but where’s that getting us? I haven’t even been offered a chance at competing, even though I’m easily the fastest runner in our gang. I’m like shit off a shovel but white, like that old stuff you used to see lying around on pavements in the eighties. I once threw a brick through Vohra’s Newsagent right in front of a rozzer and he couldn’t never catch me. I’m that Hussain Bolt bloke, but you know, faster and prouder and English coloured.

I texted the Olympics telling them how it’s not on and to put me down on the waiting list, but two weeks later I find out they’ve just handed that Mo Farah a medal. They’re totally taking the piss now, that gold belongs to us, it’s our birthright. We’re called Britain First, not Britain Not Even Allowed To Have A Go. It’s not fucking rocket surgery, is it? I hear they’ve even built a village for them now. Billions of white British people are homeless but nobody’s building them a village are they? It’s disgusting.”

We asked Mr Goulding if he had attempted to raise the matter with Mr Farah and he replied,
“We printed a request in our newsletter asking Farah to do the right thing and hand that medal to the English people, but he hasn’t even had the courtesy to reply. Clearly too busy sitting on his fat ass in his cushy flat in Olympic Village.”