After a thorough and lengthy analysis of the Chilcot enquiry, it has been agreed that the responsibility for the three-ring shit circus that was the War in Iraq falls firmly on the shoulders of lefty goon Jeremy Corbyn.

MP Tom Watson spoke to reporters today, “My mate Angela and I read through the whole thing a couple of weeks ago and were absolutely sickened by what we found. Jeremy Corbyn was banging on with all his usual, “Steady on chaps, there might be a few consequences,” crap but no way did he mean it. All he did was attend a few rallies and mumble that the war would probably further destabilise Iraq, create a power vacuum and be responsible for the deaths of thousands of innocent people. He obviously couldn’t be arsed to produce any concrete statistics at all and half the time people couldn’t even understand what he was saying because he always had a mouthful of egg and cress sandwich, the skanky old pleb. I asked him once if he wanted us to go to war and he just said, “Tom, war is utterly abhorrent to me.” That’s not a straight answer, is it? It was clear that he wanted a war and wouldn’t stop until he got one.”

Tony Blair has also expressed his disgust at Corbyn’s behavior. “Half the time he didn’t even take his Duffel coat off to address the crowds. What a disrespectful signal to the soon-to-be-dead victims of that horrible, horrible war.”