National treasure J K Rowling has said she will release an eighth Harry Potter book, to the delight of both muggles and those who don’t believe they are muggles.

Rowling said she was finding it hard to ‘stay relevant’ as an author who no longer wrote books. “I’ve tried to keep the magic alive by tweeting constantly about things I wrote 20 years ago, but apart from the occasional controversy about Dumbledore being gay or Hermione being black, nobody really talks about me any more.”

Her forays into writing about people who weren’t wizards, witches or magical creatures had been met with mixed reviews, with most critics complaining that Harry Potter wasn’t in them. ‘The Casual Vacancy’, a more adult-themed book, hinted at the new direction Rowling had planned for ‘The Eternal Franchise’.

“I would consider the new book to be in the ‘magical dystopian’ genre,” she explained. “Hogwarts is now an academy, and it’s based more accurately on a traditional British school, so half the kids smoke, all of them swear, and several of them are pregnant.

It’s the story of Harry and Ginny’s kids, and the dangers they face whilst attending a boarding school. They have to face a Cocanimagus, which is a wizard turned into a beast by Wizard Coke. The richer kids get it from dealers in Hogsmead. Which reminds me – I now have more diverse characters. Wait ’til you see my magical rasta as well. He helps the kids to relax when they learn the ‘Sensimillium Obvlisiosa’ spell. We’re getting Snoop Dogg to play him. He’s the new potions teacher.”

'Harry Potter and the Eternal Franchise' set for summer release Click To Tweet