In a week that has seen David Cameron force-fed fistfuls of humble pie (he usually prefers pork) over being a beneficiary to an offshore tax evasion scheme set up by his father, no-one’s favourite press-hungry parents, Kate and Gerry McCann have revealed they have been hiding their 12 year old daughter in an tax-free account for the past 9 years.

Madeleine McCann mysteriously disappeared in 2007, and rumours abounded over a kidnapping whilst the family holidayed in Portugal. Since then, thousands of £s and police hours have been spent on a futile search for a child it seemed impossible to find.

Mr and Mrs McCareless became suspects themselves soon after of possibly being criminally responsible for their daughter’s disappearance. They have vociferously denied having any involvement ever since.

But since the publication of the Panama Papers just days ago, the McCanns have found themselves in hot water as it has been revealed they have been keeping their eldest daughter in an offshore tax-haven, in a bid to dupe HMRC out incoming tax.

By claiming a dependent as habituating in Portugal rather than at home they were afforded thousands in tax relief over the years.

It throws a massive spanner in the works for the┬áparents after the search for Maddie was granted more funding, with the McCanns quickly backtracking by claiming the child was ‘only resting in the account’.

Haywire moral compass was the quick to divert flack from himself by jumping on the bandwagon, assuring voters “I would only ever leave my daughter in a pub, I would never leave them in Portugal. Now THAT is morally repugnant”