In a suspense-filled final episode, the Banker delivered the telephone call we’d all been waiting for. ‘Noel Edmonds, your contract has been terminated with immediate effect’.

After an eleven-year run of the gameshow, the nation breathed a collective sigh of relief as producers finally decided to call time on the pointless and immensely frustrating ‘Deal or No Deal’. The show has religiously stuck to the same format, whereby the contender used illogical guesswork, normally after lengthy hesitancy, to select a random box containing an amount of cash. Noel will then offer some typically condescending (or at best unhelpful) advice to the challenger, before answering the telephone in an uncomfortably flamboyant and exaggerated manner.

Not anymore. A clearly shell-shocked Noel said goodbye to the Banker, for what is likely to be his last time. Or at least until he misses his next mortgage repayment at any rate, which now looks all the more likely. It is reported that the show’s producers could no-longer air the show renowned as the dour epitome of day time TV. The future for presenter Noel, commonly known as the ‘real life Alan Partridge’, is now increasingly uncertain, with music fans worried that he may resort back to disc jockeying.

When trying to reach The Banker for comment, BFNN discovered him only to be a figment of Edmonds’ imagination and thus 11 years’ of pointless Schrodinger’s Boxes have been utterly futile.